Beating Cosby at his own sweater game.
posts tagged "fuckery"
Did you hear about the Italian chef that died?
He pasta way.
we cannoli do so much
his legacy will become a pizza history.
He was alfredo dying, but it happened anyway.
(Source: pointy-earedbastard, via alexandernevermind)
57 Varieties. Not to be outdone by Heinz, Samuel L Jackson has tweeted 57 different spellings of the word motherf— since joining Twitter in October 2011. Entertainment Weekly dutifully compiled the list:
Amughphuqqinvengers
Maaadaaahfaaahkaaaahz
Mahfahkka
Mahfakka
Mahpfauccauhs
Mahphakka
MAVENGERFUQQAS
MAVENGERPFUQQAHS
Mawphakkas
Moneyfondler
Motherfucker
Moughoucccah
Moughpfucca
Moughuqqas
Moupfacca
Moupfouqa
Moupfuccuh
Muffpfukah
Muffughccin
Muffukaness
Mufuggas
Mughfughquahs
Mughpfakkuh
Mughpfukkas
Mughpfukkuh
Mughphughkughzz
Mughuqqa
Muh fukka
Muhfucka
Muhfugga
Muhfuggahhhh
Muhfuggin
Muhfuka
Muhfukka
Muhfukkah
Muhfukkin
Muhfuqas
Muhfuqin
Muhpfakkah
Mupfuhqeuhs
Motherfucking
Mutha fuqeu
Muthafucka
Muhphuggas
Muthafuga
Muthafukka
Muthafukkin’
Muthaphucca
Muthavenger
Muthughpfuccahz
Muthughphoukka
Muthupfuqas
Muttuhfukkuh
Mutuphukas
Muughuuqa
Muuphuuccahs
Myfollowfukkas
(via femburton)
protect me, maria, don’t let this siren cast her spell
don’t let her fire sear my flesh and bone
destroy esmeralda and let her taste the fires of hell
or else let her be mine and mine alone#this is basically the most dramatic reaction to a boner i’ve ever seen
ERJDAVSKJFGVADFLKSJGVDAS
wsacjlfadsf;oituerildgfj
ergfoieas5ri6tu0934eoz.,xvmxcjfl es
SOIfuzsljf.,vdflkbadrugjzxcnv.x
deoisruflksdrjzqdsr,mf.xz,gperaouin.,m
sdfgoilaesrlteuirejakfgdlkj ergfdn,!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
^^^^^^
(Source: eatsleepstrokesrepeat)
A dramatic Shakespearean response to every situation
| True is it that we have seen better days. | When something bad happens: |
| O woe! O woeful, woeful, woeful day! Most lamentable day. Most woeful day That ever, ever I did yet behold! O day, O day, O day! O hateful day! Never was seen so black a day as this.O woeful day! O woeful day! | When something REALLY bad happens: |
| The Devil can cite scripture for his purpose. | When people say that something is wrong because the Bible says so: |
| FRAILTY, THY NAME IS WOMAN! | When my girlfriend abandons me for food: |
| BLOW, BLOW, BLOW, THOU WINTER WIND! THOU ART NOT SO UNKIND AS MAN'S INGRATITUDE! | When someone doesn't thank me for holding the door open for them: |
| MY CAKE IS DOUGH! | When I burn something while cooking: |
| LORD, WHAT FOOLS THESE MORTALS BE! | When human stupidity frustrates me: |
| NYMPH, IN THY ORISONS BE ALL MY SINS REMEMBER'D. | When someone says I'm going to hell for my sins: |
| My pride fell with my fortunes | When I'm broke: |
| OH, SHE DOTH TEACH THE TORCHES TO BURN BRIGHT! | When someone turns the light on after a period of darkness and blinding light ensues: |
| THERE ARE MORE THINGS IN HEAVEN AND EARTH, HORATIO, THEN ARE DREAMT OF IN YOUR PHILOSOPHY. | When someone disagrees with me: |
| The course of true love never did run smooth. | When I argue with my girlfriend: |
| MUST I HOLD A CANDLE TO MY SHAMES?! | When I'm embarrassed: |
| Good Night, Good night! Parting is such sweet sorrow, that I shall say good night till it be morrow. | Someone says "Good Night": |
